Stop Judging People by Who They Used to Be

God may have already changed the person you're still remembering.

There is something interesting about the story of Joshua leading the Israelites across the Jordan River.

In Joshua 4, God instructed Joshua to have twelve stones taken from the Jordan and established as a memorial. These stones would remind future generations of what God had done when He brought His people across the river on dry ground.

But notice something important.

God instructed them to remember what happened at the Jordan. He never instructed them to remain there.

The stones were meant to remind them of God's faithfulness, not keep them living in yesterday.

And I believe there is a powerful lesson here about how we view and judge other people.

Are We Judging Who Someone Is—or Who They Used to Be?

One of the mistakes we can make as Christians is holding people captive to our memories of them.

We remember who someone used to be. We remember their struggles, their mistakes, their weaknesses, or perhaps a season when they weren't following God closely.

Then years go by.

We see something happening in their life, perhaps through social media, a video, or something someone else has told us, and immediately begin interpreting what we see through the memory of who they once were.

But here's the question we need to ask ourselves:

What if God has already changed them?

What if the person you're remembering no longer exists in the way you remember them?

What if God has been working in their life, correcting them, strengthening them, and bringing them into a completely different season?

Second Corinthians 5:17 (KJV) says:

"Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new."

If we truly believe in the transforming power of Jesus Christ, then we must also believe that people can change.

We cannot preach transformation while refusing to recognize it in others.

Your Memory Is Not Evidence of Their Present Condition

This is where we need to be especially careful.

Just because we knew someone five or ten years ago doesn't mean we know where they stand today.

We may know their history, but that doesn't mean we know their heart.

And sometimes the most dangerous judgments are the ones we make when we believe we already understand someone.

We see a Facebook post, hear a statement, or watch a short video and immediately decide what someone is thinking, feeling, or spiritually experiencing.

But we haven't spoken with them.

We haven't walked alongside them.

We haven't listened to what God has been doing in their life.

Yet somehow, we convince ourselves that we understand their present condition.

Jesus warned us in John 7:24:

"Judge not according to the appearance, but judge righteous judgment."

Righteous judgment requires truth, not assumptions.

It requires us to examine what is actually happening rather than relying on an impression formed years earlier.

An old experience with someone does not give us authority to define who they are today.

When Our Assumptions Become "Discernment"

This is something I have experienced personally.

There have been times when people have reached out to me, convinced that God had revealed something about my life.

They believed they understood what I was doing, what I was thinking, or what was happening spiritually.

But the problem was that their understanding was based on who I used to be, not where God had brought me.

They were interpreting my present through an outdated memory.

And they were wrong.

Now, I absolutely believe the Holy Spirit speaks and guides His people. I believe God can prompt us to pray for someone, encourage someone, or even bring correction when necessary.

But we need to be careful that we aren't confusing our own assumptions with the voice of God.

Not every concern is discernment. Sometimes it's simply a memory we haven't allowed God to update.

Before telling someone what we believe God has shown us about their life, perhaps we should first ask God to examine our own hearts.

Are we responding to the Holy Spirit?

Or are we responding to an opinion we formed about someone years ago?

Are we approaching them with compassion?

Or have we already decided they're doing something wrong before we've even had a conversation?

True discernment should lead us toward truth, humility, and love—not unsupported accusations.

Relationship Matters More Than Observation

One of the things I believe we are losing in today's world is the importance of genuine relationships.

Social media has given us access to people's lives without requiring us to actually know them.

We can see their pictures, read their posts, and watch their videos while having no real

understanding of what they're experiencing.

And somehow, we begin to mistake observation for relationship.

But those are two very different things.

Watching someone's life from a distance is not the same as walking through life with them.

Relationships require time, listening, compassion, and presence.

When you've been there for someone through difficulties, celebrated their victories, listened to their struggles, and demonstrated genuine love, you've built something important: trust.

And trust creates opportunities for people to receive encouragement and correction.

Galatians 6:1 tells us:

"Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted."

Notice that the purpose is restoration.

Not humiliation.

Not proving that we were right.

Not demonstrating how spiritually discerning we believe ourselves to be.

Correction is meant to restore people, not remind them forever of who they used to be.

This doesn't mean God can never lead us to speak to someone outside an established relationship. Scripture gives us examples of God sending people with difficult messages.

But even then, we must approach others with humility, test what we believe against Scripture, and never assume we have perfect knowledge of another person's heart.

Even Paul Had to Be Seen Differently

Consider the Apostle Paul.

Before his conversion, Paul persecuted Christians. He was involved in the imprisonment and suffering of believers.

His reputation was well known.

So when Paul came to Jerusalem after his conversion, the disciples were afraid of him.

Acts 9:26 tells us they did not believe he was a disciple.

They were remembering who Paul had been.

And their concern was understandable because his past actions were real.

But God had changed Paul.

Then Barnabas stepped forward.

Acts 9:27 tells us Barnabas took Paul and brought him to the apostles, explaining how Paul had encountered the Lord and boldly preached in Jesus' name.

Barnabas helped them recognize what God was doing in Paul's present rather than allowing Paul's past to be the final word over his life.

Think about that.

What if everyone had refused to see Paul as anything other than the persecutor he used to be?

His past mattered, but it did not cancel the transformation God had begun.

And this is an important balance for us today.

We shouldn't ignore someone's past when wisdom, accountability, or safety requires us to consider it. Trust can take time to rebuild.

But we must never treat someone's past as proof that God cannot change their future.

Don't Become an Accuser of Someone God Is Restoring

There is a difference between recognizing someone's past and continually using that past against them.

We can acknowledge what someone has done without deciding that it permanently defines them.

We can exercise wisdom without becoming suspicious of everything they do.

And we can hold people accountable without denying the possibility of genuine repentance.

First Corinthians 13:7 tells us that love "beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things."

Love does not require us to be naive. But it does require us to leave room for truth, hope, and God's transforming work.

Sometimes we need to ask ourselves a difficult question:

Am I genuinely concerned about this person, or am I looking for confirmation of an opinion I already have about them?

Because if we are constantly interpreting someone's present through their past, we may not be seeing them clearly at all.

We may simply be looking for evidence that our old judgment was correct.

And that is not the heart of Christ.

Remember the Jordan, but Keep Moving Forward

The twelve stones at the Jordan were a testimony of God's faithfulness.

They reminded Israel of where God had brought them from.

But they were never meant to keep Israel from entering what God had prepared for them.

And the same is true for us.

We should remember what God has done in people's lives.

We should celebrate how far He has brought them.

We should learn from the past.

But we should not use yesterday's memories to imprison someone in a season God has already delivered them from.

Isaiah 43:19 says:

"Behold, I will do a new thing; now it shall spring forth; shall ye not know it?"

What if God is doing something new in someone's life, but we're too focused on who they used to be to recognize it?

What if our judgment is not coming from what God is revealing, but from what we refuse to let go of?

And what if, before speaking into someone else's life, God is asking us to examine our own hearts?

A Final Thought

We serve a God who restores, redeems, and transforms lives.

If we believe that, then we must give people room to grow beyond our memories of them.

We don't have to ignore sin. We don't have to abandon discernment. And we don't have to pretend that someone's past never happened.

But we do need to stop assuming that yesterday tells us everything about today.

Before judging where someone stands, take the time to discover where God has brought them.

Before claiming to know someone's heart, be willing to listen.

And before speaking correction, make sure you're motivated by love rather than an assumption.

Because the person you're still remembering may not be the person standing before you today.

Don't live in yesterday. And don't force someone else to live there either.

The stones were meant to remind us that God moves His people forward.

Perhaps it's time we allowed others to move forward, too.

Pastor Scott